gatorgirl08's Blog

I did some research this morning - which I know was a bad idea - but haven't found any real answers as to if your tube can become kinked again.

My right tube was kinked when they did the laparotomy in feb and last night while getting up I had a pain in that area. It has happened before - so just unsure what that means.

Next friday is d-day - either AF will be here - or a BFP - either way I am prepared for the worst and hoping for the best.

Its been a hard morning, reading some of the research that ectopic pregnancies are the end - there is not much of a chance for conception after an ectopic and loss of tube - but I am keeping the faith that we will get pregnant.

Seeking a miracle in a barren world? I don't really have a question - more like commentary to those in the ttc world. I don't think anyone could give anybody any better advice in this whole game other than be patient. However, if you have been anywhere near trying to conceive as some of us have - patience is not in your vocabulary. You want a pregnancy test that will give you a 100% accurate result the day after ovulation stops. That way you don't go insane and start taking the short bus to work/school because you have gone mental with every pain, twinge, smell, thought, fluctuation in weight, or that gas that might come up or out from time to time. There is nothing more frustrating on this planet than to hear from someone - just keep trying - it will happen when its meant to - or just have sex. What the heck do people think you are doing when you are trying to conceive - playing bridge? Come on - we all know we are having sex - we have become acrobatics at it - if you stand on your head with your feet pointing south and west and he ejacuates in you at the rate of 2.6 seconds it will work - well we have all tried that and heard those myths and still we read each and every story hoping to find some clue as to something we haven't done, tried, thought, prayed for, cried about, yelled about, or just plain drove 2 hours away to get.

I guess my point about this whole question/blog is this:

I know every life is precious, every bfp is a reason to celebrate, and every bfn is a reason for a tear, after all you have lived your life in seconds, not days, weeks or months counting down to that due date of AF. She has become our boogyman in adulthood. The one you fear the most coming - sometimes worse than death - because at least in death it would be easier to cope - because you know there is no hope.

So back to the question sorry - How do we not lose hope, in a hopeless world.

After countless dollars we have spent on any and every and I mean EVERY trick known to man to conceive, we still strive to have that completement in our life .

So to all those out there in ttc land - we are all in this together - as each one of us struggles through another year coming to a close and a new one opening up new possibilities I say this to you : Face each day as if it were your last. Enjoy every moment with those around you. Laugh at the stupidest things - even if its your ability to write your name in the dust on your tv. Love the person you have yelled at, cursed, hated under your breath because he hasn't made it happen - after all he is only human to. Hug the ones that you love, for they may not be there tomorrow. Remember, time marches on - so treasure all these things and enjoy the ride - life only occurs once.

• 35 minutes ago
• - 4 days left to answer.

Additional Details To all the ladies who are new to the ttc world - from one who has been there for a while - do yourself a favor and check out as many websites, articles, and books as you can on fertility. It will help you soo much and teach you all that you need to know about whats going on with your body.

I am sorry to say this because I have been one of those on here asking the ridiculous questions - but it is frustrating to see the question posted "When will I get pregnant" ! If anyone of us on yahoo answers knew that - we wouldn't be here looking for support from other ttc couples.

I know its frustrating when you don't know whats going on with your body and it helps to have people to ask - just make sure you are doing your homework as well.

You never know if you will find something out that someone hasn't found out yet or researched.

It always helps to have directions on your destination and a road map instead of driving without headlights into the fog.
 

I wrote a story and thought it was in the blog section but apparently not - so I am restating what I wrote - summed up.

I have been on the ttc wagon now for over 11 years - started when I was 20 - and have really kicked it into high gear this past 2 years.

We  lost our precious angel in Feb 2009, at 6:45 pm due to a cornual pregnancy, lost our left tube and are starting the process all over again.

We will be starting clomid again in Jan. For all those that want to follow or comment along - on the journey, please feel free to add any commentary.

We are due for our period on Xmas eve - so we are still praying for that MIRACLE that only God can give - and would be delighted to see it on XMAS day.